Monday, 31 December 2018

It all comes to an end.

Pose : FOXCITY. Lean-1

Decor : Balderdash - Green Stardrop creeper
Refuge - Spring Gala Table White
Apple Fall Coffee & Muffin
hive // potted plants . gold dust dracaenas . pot b
 ::KKs:: lace curtain - flying 5
 Taken in the BUENO-Room at the Top -Forget- RARE

I got a lil emotional with this picture. When I took it, it looked like Pickle was super sad, and I jokingly said to my Potato that it was because she'd made plans to go on holiday with a boy, and the boy turned out to be a pooper... and now she's celebrating the new year alone. I like making stories up, but this one made me have a bit of a cry-baby moment. However, after I'd added my edits, I rather think that Pickle looks like she's kinda hopeful, and that hits the nail on the head as to how I feel right now.
This last year has been completely epic. I'd been in a rut for the longest time, unable to see a clear light at the end of the tunnel, and somehow around the May, with thanks to a post I wrote in this blog... things started to change.
I've literally shaved my head from waist length to above my fricken ears, I've started leaving the house - something I hadn't done for two years - and that's not an exaggeration, I literally hadn't felt fresh air on my skin from being outside for two flippin years. I've actually figured out how to survive outside of SL by taking responsibility and giving a shit about myself.
Don't get me wrong, I haven't done this all myself.
I have been blessed with the support of friends I have never met - some of which are still present in my life, and some of which aren't, which is sad but in some cases extremely necessary to my growth process. 
I have made some of the worst mistakes of my life, and still been forgiven, and I've finally started to forgive myself, too.
I never wanted to ramble on. I believed that I didn't have anything of worth to say, but forcing myself to sit and write has made me feel entirely differently. I have had people reach out to me, thanking me for my courage. "My courage" seems like a ridiculous statement. I did nothing brave, I just wrote. I admitted my issues and addressed them... but without sounding cliche, if that helps - i'm extremely proud of being able to contribute something positive to somebody else's life.
It's almost as though writing has given power to my thoughts, to the positivity I want to project. It's allowed me to value myself before others, to focus, and to give to people the best of me because I am aware of the right times to say Yes and No.
Next year, I won't have resolutions... but I will have a continual theme, and that will be to project the positivity, not to focus on the things I can't change, and to keep on keeping on.
You should, too, because it really does get better.

All of the things : 
Body : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara
Head & Eyeliner : GENUS Project (babyface)
Skin : Not Found - Jada Skin Toffee (Genus)
Body Skin : [theSkinnery] 
Hair :Beusy: Yayo Hair & Bandana @ Kustom9 
Dress : BUENO-NYC Dress @ Kustom9 
Cardigan : ISON - agnes cardigan
Leg warmers : Addams - Nuria LegWarmer

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